Thursday, April 1, 2010

LA Phil Folds - Assets acquired by Placido Domingo

Exclusive to Rodney Punt

Breaking News: All the perceived success of the LA Phil, including Disney Hall, the Hollywood Bowl, classical, popular, and world music programs, and even Gustavo Dudamel's contract, is apparently history. The organization has been the victim of a giant financial bubble, which collapsed today, shortly after press time.

LAPO President and CEO, Deborah Borda, announced to a stunned Los Angeles community that the organization short-sold its assets to super-tenor and impresario, Placido Domingo, who acknowledged that his family trust had acquired the LAPO lock, stock, and barrel. (Rumors are running rampant that he acquired them for ten cents on the dollar.)

Separately, the LA Opera has issued a press release extending their highest sympathies to their colleagues across the street on Grand Avenue, and claiming their current production of Richard Wagner's Götterdämmerung (Twilight of the Gods) was no way timed to coincide with the announcement of the LAPO's collapse.



Anonymous said...

Some may think this is a joke, but I heard a report from the Rue Morgue that the Opera has also folded, making it a "Twilight" double header! Quel crépuscule, Nellie!

Rodney Punt said...

Flash: Domingo doubles his money with sale of LAPO assets to Cleveland Symphony.

CSO spokesman Bud Beer says, "We need to spiff up the image of our stodgy operation. We're still part of the Big Five, but let's face it, with W-M, things aren't exactly on fire here."

Their first step: Hollywood Bowl to be placed on the shores of Lake Erie.

Anonymous said...

you guys are a bunch of idiots

Anonymous said...

Please, take one to no one, won't you? Thanks very much.

I know I'm Anonymous, but who are you?